Wednesday, September 25, 2013

The Great Sheffield Pancake Incident

I am a foodie. My hips do not lie. I also, on occasion, will throw down and act like a bit of a bitchy princess. I will also admit, that I am a bit irrational at times. Some may even argue a little insane. And I may not dispute that point, because I might…somewhat…sometimes agree… But, hell, I am a woman, after all. It just stands to reason that I may, at times, become irrational…especially when booze, food, or social media are involved. Another fun, little fact about me would be that when I wake up from what I call one of my “coma naps,” people need not try to reason with me…or even talk to me…for about an hour. I needn’t have conversations, drive a car, handle heavy equipment, bake, or try and talk someone off a ledge during that “coming back to reality” hour…because bad things will happen. So, that is the little backstory as to how Great Pancake Incident transpired. Fast-forward to Tuesday, 3 p.m.— I call mom while I’m at work and ask her if we can have pancakes for dinner. While I am normally NOT a breakfast-for-dinner type-gal, I had the biggest hankering for pancakes. Well, pancakes and Nutella to be exact. Mom said she’d think on it. I should probably mention here that I do none of the cooking at our house. While I would like to think that I am a skilled baker, I absolutely HATE cooking. I hate it. So there I sit…for two long, painstaking hours thinking about my pancakes. Nutella and pancakes? HEAVEN. I go home, and decide to take a little siesta after my oh-so-long day. Fast-forward two hours when I awoke from my coma nap. I walk into our living room and ask mom where ol’ Smitty is. She tells me that he went to town to get some spaghetti sauce. **Insert “What the wha??”** **Insert crazy face** **Insert hostile, sleepy, foggy headed foodie** **Insert hissy fit befitting a two year-old.** **Insert statements such as: “Well, what the heck happened to my pancakes?” “Why do you constantly choose to make things I don’t eat.” “I DON’T EVEN EAT SPAGHETTI!” “Well whose idea was this??” Then the following conversation happened: Mom: “Aleta, I will make your pancakes for you.” Me: “Nooooooo. Don’t bother. Just fix your stupid spaghetti…Don’t worry about me.” Fast-forward a few minutes: One very un-happy, unsatisfied, grumpy princess sits on the couch eating Eggo chocolate chip waffles covered with Nutella, deleting certain people from her house off her facebook. Lessons learned: 1. I am a woman and I am sometimes utterly ridiculous. 2. I really hate spaghetti. 3. It’s not wise to not give a hungry, sleepy foodie what she wants. 4. Just because you live in my house does not mean you’re exempt from being deleted from my facebook friends. 5. I really wanted pancakes.

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Recent Obsessions

Ok, ok…so I haven’t posted in a while. While I do have quite a bit of fodder for a few posts…I have had no, and I mean NO ambition to write here lately. In trying to get all inspired, I will go back to an old crutch…my recent obsessions. 1. As I mentioned in a Facebook status today, I am absolutely in love with the message of the Semicolon movement. Last night, I stumbled across a pin on pinterest (while scoping out tattoo ideas), of a person that had a semicolon tattooed on their wrist. The person’s whole forearm was covered in scars, where I’m assuming they had cut themselves. The message below the pin said “The self-harm semicolon. On April 16, 2013 everyone who self-harms, is suicidal, depressed, or has anxiety, is unhappy, is going through a broken heart, lost a loved one, etc. draw a semicolon on your wrist. A semicolon represents a sentence that an author could’ve ended but chose not to. The author is you and the sentence is your life.” What a powerful message to anyone who is struggling. 2. A far lighter, and more trivial, current obsession of mine would be glittery eyeliner. I came across some in the Walgreens while shopping for eye shadow to wear in a friend’s wedding in early August and have loved it ever since. 3. V8 energy (preferably in Blueberry Pomegranate). It really does give you energy and tastes yummy too. 4. I’ve mentioned this more than a couple of times. But just roll your eyes and read on…I am completely obsessed with Criminal Minds. In college, I took Forensic Psychology and Abnormal Psychology under a professor named Mr. Jeannette (you may remember him from previous stories…he’s the one that sent me to an Alcoholics Anonymous class to see how group therapy worked). Hands down, the coolest, most interesting courses I took in college. We had numerous discussions about Criminal Profiling…And truth be known, if I could handle the blood and gore, I would have hopped, skipped, and jumped right into that profession. Just ask my mama, who just took dozens of my true crime/criminal profile books off to the Good will…I love the whole process of trying to see what makes a person tick. 5. And on that same note…again, I may have mentioned this… Shemar Moore? My word! I’d have his babies. 6. My hair. Now, it took me a long while to finally take the plunge and chop my hair off--and while, it’s probably going to take me a bit to learn how to style it—I am in love. Kalyn Jerrels is AMAZING. I went home last night and tried my hair combs, my bejeweled hair clips and my headbands in it…and it all looked super cute. And the plum colored highlights, gave me a modern, fresh little pop…just in time for Fall! So, if you’re searching for a stylist, I would highly recommend Kalyn! 7. Charming Charlies…If you are close to one of these stores, I stand in amazement that you aren’t up to your eyeballs in debt. This is my new favorite store. Such cute accessories! Thank you to Carrie Mizell for telling me about it, and causing my downfall 