Friday, October 18, 2013

My Fellow Travelers

I am downright giddy with the excitement of a trip upon me. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel now!!! It has been far too long since I have packed my bags and just took off. I am definitely one of those “planner” types; as much as I’d love to be spontaneous and go here, there, and everywhere…it’s just not in me. I need to at least semi-plan. This trip has been a bit of a chore for me. I had dates set, I had turned in my PLT form, my bags are practically begging for me to over-stuff them (as I tend to pack three times as much as I actually need)…and yet, you know what is missing? A location. Originally, the plan had been to go into Alabama, possibly Mississippi and tool around. However, Georgia and the Carolinas beckon…so in a little while, we will be off to Savannah (this will be Rheba’s first time in Savannah…yes, I know, the heavens just opened up and I can hear the Hallelujah chorus), we will also take in Charleston, Myrtle Beach, and possibly Wilmington. I am trying oh-so-hard NOT to have everything planned down to the minute. But I would like to ask any of you who have frequented these areas: Is there anything that we absolutely must do in any of these towns? Being the eternal foodie, are there any restaurants that we shouldn’t miss? Sights? Museums? Are there any other cities along the coast that I simply must not miss? Our last trip primarily consisted of a big shopping weekend (as it rained during most of our stay in Fernandina). I would kind of like to not shop the entire time during this trip and take in more of history, sights, etc. I was fortunate enough to go to Savannah a few years ago, and I loved it…so I’m looking forward to returning there. I have been to Charleston, but it was during M-Fuge, and we didn’t get to see much of the city. As for Myrtle Beach and Wilmington…I am at a complete loss. Whatever advice y’all have for me would be greatly appreciated.

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Fall into Fabulousness.

Tonight, I got an email from Pinterest saying that my friend Naomi had tagged me in a comment. When I went to the pin, it said “If you look in the mirror and say “pumpkin spice latte” three times, a white suburban girl in yoga pants will appear and tell you everything she loves about Fall.” First off...I liketa died. How true is that? I’m a white girl, yoga pants are my favorite, and I LOVE FALL. I love the color orange. I love when the leaves change. I love boots. I love scarves. I love hoodies. I love cuddling. I love sitting by the fire. I love EVERYTHING pumpkin. I love hot chocolate. I love when Bath and Body works comes out with the fall scents. I love football games. I love the promise of a change every fall. I love the smell of fall.... Lol. It’s time for a contest, y’all. Ok, so, is it odd that I’d picked out a prize for this contest before I’d established what I wanted the contest to be? Lol. Here is what I’m looking for: I want you to submit a photo that is the epitome of Fall, in your eyes. It could be a picture of a landscape. It could be a picture of an interesting old house. Hell, it could be a photo taken at a football game. I'm so excited to see what Fall is to y'all! I have a muse board of things that remind me of places and times to inspire me to write...and I am dying to have some Fall pics to add to my muse board. --- The prize: Some of Aleta’s favorite things... I promise, if you’re a girl...and you like girly girl stuff...this is right up your alley. Some of the items in the prize basket include: my all-time favorite lip gloss (Urban Decay Lip Junkie), Lauren Conrad earrings, a unique and super cute headband:), one of my favorite books, and some other goodies that I haven't decided upon just yet :) The deadline: November 15th. I want everyone to guys, if you so should choose, I’m sure the girl in your life would be thrilled to get the prize. How to submit? Email me on facebook...or email me at Y’all get to submittin’ :)

Sunday, October 6, 2013

Celebrating Cornbread

Tomorrow is my daddy’s birthday. And I cannot believe that he’s been gone almost two years now. Time is passing so quickly, it’s hard to believe. Rather than having a blog post that talks about how much I miss him, and Lord knows I miss him, I thought this would be a great time to do a compilation of his funny quotes, and his funny stories. I will add a little disclaimer about some of the you will notice, many of the pictures I post are of him without a shirt. He did, in fact, own shirts, lol, he just preferred not to wear them when lounging around at home. So if my pictures offend you, I’m sorry. So here goes: Cornbread on driving: “If you wouldn’t have had your radio up that loud, you wouldn’t have had that flat tire.” “If you drive 45 mph everywhere, you’ll save on gas.” “Aleta, in the last two weeks you got a speeding ticket and hit a parked car...that doesn’t speak too well does it?” (Talking about a certain somebody driving a porta-potty truck): “She drives that shit truck like it’s a firetruck headed to a fire!” His favorite story about his slow driving: “There I was, driving the inmate van to Itchetucknee, and we went through the School Zone. That crossing guard always hated to see me coming. The school zone was 15 mph, so of course I went 5. There that lady stood, waving her hands for me to go faster, yelling “keep going, c’mon!” The inmates just laughed. Now, if any of y’all ever got behind my dad while driving, you’d have known it... He was one of the only people that could make church members cuss both going to and coming from church. And Lord knows you didn’t pass him. I did once. I had had it. He was going 30 the whole way home, I’m sure just for my benefit, and I’d just had it. So I sped past him... which led to this statement when he made it home: “Aleta, you drive like a bat outta hell.” What? Because I went the 55 speed limit? :) Cornbread on idiots: “He’s not the sharpest knife in the tool shed.” Cornbread on Dental Hygiene: While watching his favorite show “Hee-Haw” one night on tv, he took out his dentures and started cleaning them. As I watched him eyeing his teeth, he looked over at me and said “My God, I think I’ve got a cavity.” If you can’t say anything nice, come sit by Cornbread: We used to have a lady, (bless her heart), that we were around that thought she could sing. The only real way I can describe the voice is: Tammy Wynette on crack. Well, dad, any time this lady would get up to sing, would look over to my cousin’s wife, Jodi. And she’d try as hard as she could not NOT look at him. And just as soon as she did, those big eyes of his would near ‘bout roll back in his head. I must say here, that I’ve nearly got “that” look down-pat now ;) After Easter service, as soon as he walked in the door: “That ugly little girl made fun of my overalls. Hell, you’d have to tie a pork chop around her neck to get the dog to play with her...and she made fun of my overalls.” “She’s good people. She’s a burnt out pothead, but she’s good people.” Honesty IS the best policy: We had an Evangelist visit our church multiple times. Now, dad was not the fondest of this man, and normally, if he knew he was coming, dad would just go to Sunday School and then head home...but he actually sat through his sermon one Sunday. Towards the end of the service, the Evangelist asked the congregation who was planning to come back that Sunday evening. A majority of the church dutifully raised their hands. Then, the Evangelist asked the congregation who was planning not to attend that evening. I looked over at dad, as he was hard to miss, as he raised his hand high towards the heavens, the only hand raised in the whole congregation. Nope, he sure wasn’t planning on coming back that evening. Cornbread on the War on Drugs: During a dinner party...with church-going family the middle of dinner....out of the blue: “You know...we just need to legalize marijuana...I mean, we’re just losin’ this whole war on drugs.” Cornbread on alcohol: At the New Year’s Eve party at my Aunt’s house, to Jarrod who was pouring him sparkling grape juice: “Now, this doesn’t have any alcohol in it, right? I don’t want to get drunk.” Someone told him that a sip or two of wine might help when he woke up with muscle cramps, so we had some in the house. He tried this trick, he had maybe two sips. Here was the conversation that ensued the next morning: Mom: “So, Jackie, did the wine help the cramps last night?” Dad: “Not really, it just made me drunk.” Cornbread on healthcare: To a nurse, after he’d been kept on a liquid diet for two days: “I know what y’all are doin’...y’all are gettin’ me all slim and trim so I’m casket sharp.” After giving the stink eye to a nurse, after dad was returned to his room after a minor surgery: “Cindi, you would not believe where they had me!! You would not believe where they did my surgery. They had me in the woodshed out back.” Walking in one morning to one mad Cornbread...sitting there with his arms crossed, his eyes rolling..... “Dad, did you sleep okay?” (insert eyeroll) “Hell no. They put me in here with him (as he points to his roommate), and he had his tv going wide ass open all night.” Cornbread on Politics: “You know who I’m writing in on my ballot? Willie Nelson. He’d get rid of the IRS and he’d legalize marijuana.” Cornbread on a balanced diet: “I need to start eating better. I do. (As he sorts through the plate put in front of him) Now, who wants this banana. I don’t want that crap.” “I don’t like grape popsicles. They make me burp.” Cornbread on Foreigners “You know those people from England that can’t speak good English?” Cornbread on Religion: This conversation happened while awaiting surgery, to determine whether he would accept a blood transfusion if needed: Nurse: “Sir, are you Jehovah’s Witness?” Dad: “Hell no! I’m Baptist.” Cornbread on phone etiquette: I cannot tell you how many times in my life I’ve heard my dad answer the phone “Well, hey you big dummy.” To telemarketers: “Don’t you ever call our house and wake me up on a Saturday again!” “Hell no, we’re not interested.” When the Pizza Hut Delivery man hadn’t come within an hour’s time, on the phone with Pizza Hut: “Well, thank God that boy wasn’t driving an Ambulance.” Cornbread on Work Ethic: “I lovvvvve my job.” (I think that this far...was his favorite saying, ever.) Truth be told, my daddy provided me the funniest material to write with. For those of you that were blessed enough to be around him, you knew how funny he was. There are so many things, so many funny memories that pop into my mind every day. My mom, Rheba and I were truly blessed to be “Jackie’s Girls.” He brightened our lives with his dramatic flair and always put a crazy spin on any situation. I miss him terribly, but you know what? Laughter has always been what got me through anything hard. This year on his birthday, I want to celebrate his life, not mourn our loss. I want to laugh at his memory. I want to remember him in his best possible form. If you have any funny memories, I encourage you to post them. I would love to read them!