A case of the Uglies

Have you ever had a week (or month) where you just KNOW you look like fido’s butt? You’re still gettin’ up and “paintin’ the barn,” as my preacher would say, but it sure ain’t pretty? This is how I’m feeling right now.

I think old age is settin’ in y’all. For real. I wake up every morning feeling like I got into a fight with a chimpanzee during the middle of the night. My back aches, my neck aches, and I would rather just put the covers back over my head and wake up in 2012. I stumble, and I do mean stumble considering the disaster area that is my room, to my bathroom. I gaze into the mirror and think “Oh dear Jesus.” I’m getting wrinkles in between my eyebrows…no doubt from giving a million “hairy eyeballs.” It is just not pretty. I used to LOVE to do my makeup, now it’s become more of a chore than anything. I’m using the same old shades, despite the fact that I just bought four packs of new eyeshadows. If I could be like the cast of Jersey Shore and wear my sunglasses indoors, I’m certain it would brighten my mood.

And don’t get me started on my wardrobe. I have fell into the “wear it because it’s comfortable” phase. We’re talking hair up in a ponytail, jeans, t-shirt (the “of-the-Hanes-variety” with something ironed-on it…whether it be “Savannah,” my B.S. shirt, or my Cow-tipping shirt, really, they’re all the same), and flip-flops.

And the uglies hasn’t just stopped with my wardrobe, hair, and makeup…it’s attacked my (gulp) social skills as well. FOR example, I have a magnet inside of me that attracts people with problems. And, I have a neon sign that flashes “I care” when these people come near me. Need I remind you of the lady that showed me her tax bill and complained to me about how her property taxes were done all wrong. –Mind you, I still work at the Journal and have NO IDEA how any of this related to me-- Then, she told me how she was going to strike it big selling concrete molds to make garden gnomes. Anywho, back to my point…I can’t even PRETEND to care anymore. I can’t carry on mindless babble (aka small talk) conversations.

It’s bad. Really bad. Let’s hope this case of the uglies goes away soon.

Oh, on a happy note, I DID get my ears pierced again last weekend. Now that the stinging has stopped, I am quite pleased with the outcome. Now I have 3 holes in one ear and 2 in the other. So I can check that off my to-do list.

BTW, considering the state I’m in and the cluelessness on attire currently, What in heck would you wear to a Fiddlin’ Concert??

Yes, I, Aleta Kaylee, will be attending the Fiddlin’ Concert tomorrow night. What to wear?...What to wear?