Friday, January 22, 2010

More things I don’t understand…

1) Why everyone thinks the newspaper office is the operator.

2) Who thought this would be an appropriate Christmas gift for someone? (Please note the eyeglasses, pearls, and extra feathers…if you can’t see it clearly enough, please click on it to enlarge…I swear to the Lord Almighty that one of my family members received this thing one year for Christmas…why??). Although this totally takes the cake for bad gifts, I had another family member receive a bejeweled roach pin to put on their best Sunday dress.

3) Why the one night I go to pick up my sister at a basketball game, in a nightshirt with no pants on, there are cops ALL over the premises flashing lights into cars.

4) Why there are some doors that seem to have no meaning. Please note the top door...with no stairway. It's just a door. I get to see this everyday.

5) Why some fathers-of-the-bride deem it their job to tell the bridesmaids how to hold their bouquet. –I swear y’all, this actually happened in a wedding I was in, and I wanted to deck the father-of-the-bride before it was said and done.

6) Why someone thought it was a good idea to add the Cow Auction to RFDtv.

7) Why should we still be punished just because someone lied thirty years ago, in church, and told someone that they sang beautifully. The joke has been over for thirty years, pal. She's still tone-deaf. Why must we still be tortured??

8) Why are some “Come Adopt a Pet” Ads sounding more like personal ads? O.M.G. there was a crazy one about 6 months ago in a not-to-be-named publication in the Levy County area that was a girl dog “wanting to meet a good male dog.” WTH???

9) Why do some white girls think their long-lost talent is rapping??

10) Why do I always get into arguments with the relay operators that call me at work? Every time, it goes like this:

Me: Journal, how can I help you?
Relay lady: This is a relay call, I will be reciting what the person on the other line is typing to me. Me: Let me make this simple,…we don’t take credit cards.
RL: Ma’am, I still have to recite what they type. Could you please repeat what you said, beginning with “Journal?”
Me: Ma’am, this is a waste of time, we don’t take credit cards. The person typing will hang up if you tell them that.
RL: Could you please repeat that slower, beginning at “Ma’am.”

Very, very irritating. However, I did get the satisfaction of arguing one time until the Relay woman cussed. Though, maybe I shouldn’t brag about that. :)

11.) Why is it that young country music singing girls think that hopping is dancing?? I may love their music, but Lord, they cannot dance (neither can I, and that is why I stay off the dance floor).

12.) Why were ascots ever popular?

13.) Why are meek and mild people so prone to road rage?

14.) Why is it that ALL teenage boys in this area go through that stage of going through town making the noise: “WAAAAAAAAAH, WAH, WAHHHHHHHH!” with their trucks. O.M.G.

15.) Why do we have to have A SIGN in our office over a display of post-its, saying “Not edible?” And the sad thing is…people still ask.

16.) Why kids that skate off of people’s roofs at 15, are likely to be the next Bill Gates?

17.) Why does everyone invite me to be their neighbor on farmville?? I don't want to help you raise a damn barn. :) lol

To end this, I’m going to post a picture of what is hanging on my wall at work. I’m still mad, if you couldn’t tell ;-)


  1. OK, so I totally agree with #'s 2, 4, 8, 12, & ESPECIALLY 17!!! And I'm wondering why you thought you could get away with a nightshirt and no pants? I've been reading this blog for a while Aleta, and I think I have a pretty good idea what your luck is like ;)!!!!

  2. HAAAAAAA!!! Too funny.. the chicken(?) Christmas present is is the rest of this post! :)

  3. This post has totally made my day :) I love you, girl! You're crazy as a bed bug, but I love you!!!

    P.S.-Where could I find one of those chickens? I have a certain co-worker in mind for next Christmas!

  4. Too funny, but I have to agree with most of these! To be such a smart people we are really DUMB!

  5. what the heck is on the wall??? and I actually love the chicken... I might want it as a pet! crack me up!

  6. Katie...that is one ugly a$$ chicken...maybe you should see it in person. LOL. And it's a voodoo doll hanging on my wall, upside down, with pins all in it. :)