Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Pink boas and glitter

This is the first installment to “Aleta’s Guide to being a Biddy.” I’ll call it…. “Shoving Cinderella down a flight of stairs.”
A “princess,” by my definition, is a spoiled brat that strives for attention in any possible way, and fails to realize that the world doesn’t revolve around her. A friend was telling me this week that she has been blessed with “a princess” in her life. I take great pity on my friend because I know how very bothersome they can be. Unfortunately, one of my guy friends always seemed to wind up dating princesses. Every time he did, we would have to put up with her until he got smart and would realize that she “wasn’t right for him.”—As a side note, it really is for the best that he would realize this. Once I swore to one of our mutual friends that if I had to put up with his “princess” one more time, I would take a bat to her new car. Moody? Irritable? Border-line crazy? …maybe ;-) But not surprising, really. -- Frankly, I’ve never been great with slapping a fake smile on my face. Generally, I’m pretty transparent. If I don’t like you, you’ll know it.
In dealing with a princess, the only remedies for your sanity that I’ve been able to come up with are: sarcasm, honesty, and the Aleta death glare. Using sarcasm to point out either their flaws or their idiotic strives for attention might just hurt their feelings…but then again, maybe they’ll see what a big baby they are really being (or maybe the people that are under her spell will see it). There really is a point in time where you just can’t sugarcoat things anymore. This is when honesty comes into play. The next time that you are having a big event, and she is crying over a hangnail, I would just tell her to “suck it up and be a woman. Life isn’t always pink boas and glitter, Sweetie, sometimes we just have to deal.” I would just stop being nice to her. And finally, if your princess hasn’t gotten the subtle hints, give the Aleta death glare a try. Really, it’s no different than any other death glare…you just squint your eyes and crease your forehead. Then you give them a look that says…(in a creepy Russian voice)… “I am mentally setting you ablaze. Moo-hah-ha-ha” Haha. :) Hopefully, this gives y’all some ideas.
BTW, as a warning…don’t give too many people the Aleta death glare. Choose wisely. I’ve apparently given it to WAY too many people. I’m getting a vertical wrinkle in between my brows. Well, that and I’m going to have arthritis in my traffic finger…but I digress… ;-)


  1. Ohh...I definitely have the death glare's kind of an evil Care Bear stare! :) I too am straight forward...I've made people cry (some of them wasn't on purpose)...some people just can't take sarcasm or criticism. :-P You are so funny!

  2. Aleta, you absolutely have the most randomly fun blog entries! And I am almost positive I could identify a few who fit your definition of princess!